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The Lord Moon Of The Mall, Whitehall - pub details

Lord Moon Of The Mall
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Address: 16-18, Whitehall, London, SW1A 2DY [map] [gmap]

Tel: 0871 951 1000 (ref 927) - calls cost 10p per minute plus network extras

Nearest tube stations Charing Cross (0.2 miles), Embankment (0.2 miles), Leicester Square (0.4 miles)

Nearest train stations London Charing Cross (0.2 miles), London Waterloo (0.7 miles), London Waterloo East (0.8 miles)

Chain: Wetherspoons

Pub facilities/features:
Cask Marque accreditation

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> Current user rating: 5.6/10 (rated by 116 users)
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other pubs nearby:

Old Shades, Whitehall (0.0 miles), Silver Cross, Whitehall (0.0 miles), Clarence, Whitehall (0.0 miles), Walkers of Whitehall, Whitehall (0.0 miles), Sir Humphrey Appleby, Whitehall (0.1 miles) - see more nearby pubs

user reviews of the Lord Moon Of The Mall, Whitehall

please note - reviews on this site are purely the opinion of site visitors, so don't take them too seriously.

5 most recent reviews of 157 shown - see all reviews

I am moved to declare that the Moon has been re-carpeted and re is right as it all looks tremendously similar.

In either a nod/broken neck to posterity or a distressing lack of innovation, the style is very much as it was. The textile is surely new, although neither having seen the receipt or been present at the CARPETRIGHT purchase I cannot guarantee this as FACT, to quote Rafa. It is a dark red colour, according to my eyes, with an elaborate fleur-de-lis design that is reminiscent of Milady de WInter's telltale tattoo. She is surely the saint of the Moon's various thieves (my phone was nicked here c2005, a white and orange Nokia with a then innovative joystick-type feature. The police never bothered with the CCTV or indeed the BBC they were more EPISILON MINUS than JULIET BRAVO) although being a fictional character she cannot be the patron saint in the sense of being both a patron and a saint. More likely a drink cadger or swiper of unguarded pints.

The underlay is surely new, given the delightfully bouncing tread which raises the heel, much like BUZZ ALDRIN in his venture of 1969 upon another and less celebrated MOON, if indeed THAT occured (see CAPRICORN ONE with Elliot Gould and James Brolin with a winning cameo from TELLY SAVALAS as curmudgeonly crop dusting slaphead). It may be TREDAIRE or similar top quality item. I wonder if they used the old grippers (not STEBSON) or did they "[Oi!]leave it out [Gripper]"? It's a mystery for the ages.

Perhaps the original carpet has merely been vigorously washed with a VAX or similar electronic device like the ones you can trent from certain TESCO's? If so, I shudder to contemplate the dire, viscous, abortionate filth that needs must have been sucked from that much abused pile. Piles on piles - the ultimate horror. Ground, congealed MEXICAN MONDAY burritos and calcified chicken from CURRY THURSDAY when Wetherspoons claim to become the nation's biggest "CURRY 'OUSE" although the buildings do not transfigure from bricks and mortar into pitilessly hardened PITTA BREAD with JALFREZI paste.

FritzBlitzkrieg - 9 Jul 2015 16:38
I work near the pub and go in to it on occasions. A good beer selection and reasonably priced but there is never enough staff on. Seems the same in all Wetherspoon's pubs. Prefer to go the Harp or the Ship and Shovell. More expensive but the service is better and quicker.
Boyne - 23 Jan 2015 14:49
This Wetherspoons is always very crowded with large groups of bewildered tourists who do not know how to order food and drinks in a British pub, (NO, there is no waiter service!!). However it always seems to have a good range of ales in good condition. Expensive for a 'spoons but cheap for the area.
Aztecgoat - 17 Jan 2015 10:01
It's a Wetherspoons. Its certainly not the worst or most desperate Wetherspoons & the building itself is impressive. The beer is usually too cold but it's drinkable and there's often a couple of unusual beers. It's always busy with tourists although it always amuses me to see groups of tourists who wander in, walk around a bit and then wander out again. Why?
An average 6/10.
stevenagec - 15 Aug 2014 17:25
As I wandered lonelier than WORDSWORTHS'S cloud past this celebrated liver killer, these eyes bore witness to various workmen buzzing and grafting both within and without, like Stakahnovite bees trapped in time and space.

One was painting the black iron railings a surprising shade of shadiest black. He used a small roller, and no, I don't reference a Carmargue or other short wheel-based Royce. His work was adequate. I tossed a coin of small denomination.

The doors of the esteemed establishment were open, despite it being closed. My mind reeled at the tempting paradox, like "the sun so hot, I froze to death" in the hit of yesteryear "Oh, Susanna" (before she quit BBC Breakfast, naturally). The Goat of Mendips, or whatever, he tempted me to enter and I took his challenge. The fact I was wrapped in a fluorescent tabard aided this misadventure for it is the ironic uniform of the blue collar worker and allows unusually free locomotion on many a site. Try it, dear reader, and you will stagger at its power.

I must say the Moon stank of more than the rank hopelessness and vile B.O that was its signature pre-closure. I waited at the bar and was not served: plus ca change, as they say in GAUL.

FritzBlitzkrieg - 12 Jun 2014 16:51

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