The Dolphin, Portsmouth

Went to The Dolphin on Bank Holiday Monday. We ordered drinks and I paid by card. The lady serving me didn't exchange any friendly banter..not even a hello..and moaned to her colleague (equally grumpy) about the card machine and how she was due to go off shift soon. We had a quick look at the food menu and deceided to order..ut oh..same grumpy lady..annndd I was going to use my card. There were three of us, the two boys had a burger each and i went for the cajun chicken goujons (which were actually in tempura batter, rather than breaded which constitutes a goujon) Now, there were two price options for the goujons..�3.95/�8.95. I assumed the �8.95 was a main portion and asked if they came with chips 'No. they come with salad, just like it says up there.' So, finding myself feeling like a school child in trouble, I apologised and ordered an extra portion. We weren't given a table number, so I asked if it was ok to go to the outdoor area until the food was ready as we had the dog with us..'yeah..she'll call u'.

So, outside in the peaceful garden, we were yelled at ' u eatin' in or what?' so we all scurried inside and found a seat. Then the matron-like woman stomped over..'oh..I hadn't sat u there..I sat u there' and stomped over, got our knives and forks and slammed them on the table where we were.

By the time the food got to us, we were fearful to ask for sauces incase it incurred yet another sigh or teenage stomping stroppy walk as if it was too much trouble.

The food was lovely, that cannot be faulted. But the service was unacceptabe. There were two Americans on the table next to us and we only hope that they didn't think that the service in this pub was a true depiction of English hospitality.

We said goodbye and thanks as we left only to be met with stoney silence. We worked out that we had spent over �70 and in this current economic climate, service like this is not good business sense as we will not be returning. The best advertisement is word of mouth, well we will be telling our friends about the French and Saunders-esque debaucle that we experienced at The Dolphin, what a shame.

31 Aug 2011 12:55