The Riverside Inn, Chelmsford

I usually steer clear of that awful phrase "You pays your money, you takes your choice� � after all why is the English so poor? However, it perfectly sums up your dilemma if you happen to be in Chelmsford, hungry and thirsty.

One option would be to head to The Riverside with its attractive Oak beams, comfy sofas and beer garden next to the river. You could order an appallingly mediocre Cumberland Sausage sandwich made with slices of Mother�s Pride (very 1970s) and very soggy onions. You could then go to the bar and order a pint of Best and a G&T and get charged approximately �7.80 for the privilege. When you question the cost with bar staff, you�ll be told that the (single) G&T cost nearly �5 because they only have small bottles of Britvic tonic that cost almost as much as the gin. You�ll notice that much of the clientele will be wearing suits and are most-likely business travellers staying in the hotel rooms or local office-workers, in for a lunchtime pint or two. It will probably cross you mind that, OK - the prices are very steep but at least it keeps out the riff-raff. What absolutely will not cross your mind is that if you actually lived about 100 metres from the pub (as I do), The Riverside would make a fantastic local. The reason for this is because you�d have the constant feeling that you were being well & truly ripped-off and that the management knows that � thanks to all those lovely business travellers and their expense accounts - they really don't have to try very hard at all.

Another option � the one that I will always plump for � is to walk the five minutes into town to one of the two JD Wetherspoon outlets. In either of these, I�ll know that � despite the occasionally dodgy fellow punter and habitually understaffed bar - I�ll be able to get an excellent sandwich (on one of those fancy foreign breads that have been all the rage for the last ten years or so) and either a pint or a G&T and still get change from seven quid.

You pays your money��

28 Jul 2009 12:39