BITE user comments - OK_just_a_quick_half
Comments by OK_just_a_quick_half
It would have taken something pretty desperate to make me go back to this pub, and so it was last Thursday evening when I arrived at New Malden station absolutely bursting for a pee. OK, I thought, just this once. Being incapable of brazenly use a pub's facilities without at least ordering a quick half, I had time to take stock and re-evaluate the place. And after staying there for well over an hour (not with the same half), during which I was not glassed, threatened, stared at or abused even once, I came to the conclusion that the place has indeed changed.
There's live music there for start (well there was on this Thursday); a couple of guys with accoustic guitars doing their best not to mangle too many classics. Plus there's a football table (glass-topped, unfortunately) that to me is a sign of civilisation.
On the evidence of this visit at least, I'll be going back.
8 Oct 2006 12:07
The Windmill on the Common, Clapham Common
This is going back some twenty years but it's still a good story. I had ordered a round of drinks and was busy carrying them to where my mates were standing (some distance from the bar). Eventually, I came back for my own pint of Special. Putting it to my mouth I immediately noticed that it smelled of piss. I'm not being colloquial here, it really did smell of urine.
So I handed it back to the barman. He took one sniff and said "George has been up to his old tricks again." Basically, there used to be a local nutter who wore this kind of one-piece boiler suit with a tube sewn into it. One end was clamped to his old man, and the other came out at his sleeve. He'd get off on quietly adding his piss to strangers' pints. How weird is that?
The funny thing was the reaction of the bar staff. Surely they would have barred George the very first time they'd caught him performing his 'old trick', not let him back in to do it again and again.
Anyway, the Windmill will always have (mostly) happy memories for me as I met my future wife there. Ahh...
12 Apr 2006 17:30
I first discovered this pub when I was working at Carlson in Putney Bridge Road and thought it one of those few pubs that you'd actually consider moving home to be near. The Island Queen in Islington is another one. But I didn't, ending up in bloody New Malden instead.
However, it's worth assuring those who've worried that the pub is in imminent danger of being discovered by yuppies or the 'Hoxton set' (bit of a hike for them isn't it?) that this has probably happened already, and the pub has survived the experience. After all, that first visit of mine was back in 1996, and I remember thinking precisely the same thing then - that it was somehow about to be ruined by people who won't 'get it'.
Glad to hear that it's still the same. Shame about the price increases, though.
11 Apr 2006 16:19
Marketing psychologists will tell you that a certain amount of difficulty in achieving something helps to increase the ultimate sense of reward. Hence, for example, one-armed bandits are easy to put money into, but to pick up any winnings (as if) you have to stoop down and feel around in an implausibly long trough, eventually coming up with your 20p coin with a feeling of real triumph. So, the trek to Woodies may be long and arduous, but boy is it worth it.
For such a pub to exist anywhere without the safe and healthy people closing it down or the breweries homogenising it is pretty remarkable by itself. That it should thrive and prosper in New Malden - base camp for Daily Mail readers - is a miracle.
The thing is, I'm not particularly interested in the big screen and the sports events. I'd be more attracted by a pub with a huge sign outside proclaiming 'Here! Live conversation!'. I've never stuck around for the quiz night and seem to have missed the live bands completely. I can't even comment on the food, preferring to drink in pubs and eat in restaurants.
But for all that, Woodies still offers something magical. I suppose it's what we used to call atmosphere and what today is known as ambience. True, the great range of beers helps, as does the enormous collection of (mainly sporting) ephemera that adorns every square millimetre of wall and ceiling space. And the customers - shouty football fans notwithstanding - who represent more of a cross-section of the neighbourhood than any of the other pubs in New Malden, thus lending the pub the social balance that, in my opinion, every good local should have.
In the end, it probably comes down to the management. It is they who determine the 'feel' of a pub, and in Woodies case they are quite happy for it to remain quirky, interesting, welcoming, rewarding and, for the area, utterly unique.
Give it a try.
11 Apr 2006 16:06
This much I know: always avoid pubs with the words 'railway' or 'station' in their names.
19 Jan 2006 16:32
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The North Pole, Canary Wharf
Yes, it's well and truly closed.
I came across this place when freelancing in Canary Wharf. Proper old school. Ordered a pint and omelette and chips. Was asked for my name; which the barmaid shouted out when the food was ready some 15 minutes later.
Went there again about a week later and the barmaid greeted me by name and remembered the drink I'd had last time.
The chances of that happening at any of the bland lager chains in Canary Wharf were, and still are, pretty close to zero.
4 Jun 2014 14:47