The Regent, Balham

Just ate here tonight. Well, It was shit. The food was passable but appeared like an after thought. Had the 'chefs special' Lamb hot-pot-stew-slow-roasted-seasonal blah. And it was tasty enough. In the way food cooked at home as a student was tasty. It looked like food my grandmother used to not-so-lovingly-prepare (shovel out) which would be amazing if it wasn't less 1/4 the serving size. My grandmother also never charged 13.90 mutherfucking pounds for the displeasure.
Honestly though, worse than the pitfall servings, the cavernous soulless australiananess, and the deafening christian R&B(listen closely if you dare) was the atrocious attitude of the staff serving. Despite spending well over 150 quid on a Gullivers travels version off grandmas tried and tested, my party was moved on for another booking like moroccan leather cattle. Pints were removed half drunk. When I was putting on my coat the twat waiter, as he was joining another table to ours deliberately rammed the table into my legs to indicate (just in case I was putting on my coat to order a second course of sub par tripe) that it was time to leave.

This joint sucks. It is so typically Clapham/Balham average town that even reviewing it seems like paying too much respect. Go anywhere but here. Go to the fucking Moon on the Water! 4 quid a pint too! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

P.S. Two of the serving bar staff, the short bloke with the moustache and the young attractive girl with massive hoolios were very polite and deserve to work somewhere better than this dump.

3 Nov 2012 23:19

The Duke of Edinburgh, Brixton

They do seem to try hard. It's definitley much better than a weatherspoons. The inside is nicely decorated and the fire in winter is ace but the food is too expensive for what it is - Significantly dearer than the White Horse- and no Ales. The black furniture in the beer garden is shame - makes a potentially great space appear like a cross between back burnt scrub land and Grand Central station for the ghost train. Drop the food prices. Get some Ales. Paint the Furniture. Turn the football volume down. Or I spose I could just F-off and make a pub of my own.

3 Dec 2011 11:12

The Old Queens Head, Islington

Nice bar with good music that used to be free, but suffering badly from its own reputation for a number of years now. I mean It is techincally still good, but once inside if you stop to ask yourself if you are really enjoying the place, more often than not that answer's gonna be a NO. Pretentious f*&ks inside nowdays too. Not friendly.

20 May 2010 19:25

Gigalum, Clapham South

Expensive, fascile suburban bar. Occasionally delicious barmaids and vain and cerebrally challenged career barmen... Skip it unless you're a moron or have a decent shot with one of the braindead coked up hotties that frequent.

20 May 2010 19:19